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LIGHTEN UP!
Some Tortured Laughs from the evil Late Night Comedians

"Did you see this Clinton thing on Fox? [on screen: Bill Clinton's interview with Chris Wallace on 'Fox News Sunday']. Wow, talk about an overreaction. Chris Wallace just asked him a perfectly legitimate question [on screen: Depends On What Definition of 'Legitimate' Is]. He just basically asked, why did you let those 3,000 people in the World Trade Center die? And Clinton freaks out [on screen: Burst His Bubba]. Clinton even had the nerve to question why Wallace never asked the Bush administration the same thing. Well, there's an excellent reason [on screen: You Don't Criticize Your Boss]." - Stephen Colbert

"It's great to have Bill in the mix again. It puts conservatives back on the offensive. Now they can get back to doing what they do best [on screen: Fear Gay People]. Pointing out that everything wrong with this country is Bill Clinton's fault." - Stephen Colbert

"The Senate has voted to approve the building of a 700-mile fence along the 2,000-mile border of Mexico. This is what happens when you let President Bush do the math." - Jay Leno

"With rumors swirling of him possibly running for office, George Clooney said the only thing he plans to run for has two legs and a skirt. To which Ted Kennedy said, 'You can do both.'." - Jay Leno

"Tip of my hat to George Clooney. That hunk of left-wing man meat recently shrugged off suggestions that he might run for political office. Bravo, Clooney. As I've said many times before, actors have no place espousing political views, or having political views, or voting. Besides, I think it's in the Constitution that no government office shall be held concurrently by more than one cast member of 'Batman and Robin' [on screen: CA Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger]." - Stephen Colbert

"Virginia Republican Senator George Allen is in trouble for repeatedly making racially insensitive remarks, insulting people for their background and displaying Confederate memorabilia in his office. I don't get it. Today he blamed the whole thing on the Jewish-controlled media." - Jay Leno

"In discussing Hillary Clinton's run for the presidency, the Reverend Jerry Falwell said the faithful are scared by Hillary Clinton. To which Bill Clinton said, 'Hey, not as much as the unfaithful. Believe me.'." - Jay Leno

"Earlier tonight, President Bush had dinner with the President of Pakistan and the President of Afghanistan. Tomorrow, the president will have breakfast with Count Chocula and Captain Crunch." - Conan O'Brien

"A lot of fighting going on right now in the political scene. Yesterday, Senator Hillary Clinton lashed out at Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice for comments Rice had made about former President Clinton. Today, Bill Clinton suggested, 'You know, we should settle this with an old-fashioned three-way.'." - Conan O'Brien

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10.02.06 - REBUBLICAN SCANDAL UPDATE RANT. The fun never stops at the GOP fun factory. I had just posted the above cartoon as the Foley page turner was in its opening chapters. Bob Woodward's book turned out not to be another kiss-ass puff piece. So - much - new - material -- must draw new cartoon! That being said, I'm probably not alone in my confusion and bewilderment over this latest rash of GOP scandal. Why is another sex scandal gaining traction where the scandal of tens of thousand of dead innocents could not? But in my outrage over our collective selective outrage, I also find myself thinking "anything that works. If it brings down the House of Bush, then I don't care if it is a scandal over Barney impregnating the neighbor's show dog!"

Ah, yes. Clear evidence, the apologists will say, that I am merely another Bush-hater(TM), so blinded with rage over the come-uppance imposed upon Bill Clinton that any Bush setback is viewed as a victory! Utter nonsense, of course. I am not a Bush hater. I loathe the man; I hate his policies and what they have done to America and our standing in the world. What they have done to our constitution, to our security, to our treasury, to our prospects for the future. Sure, I hate that shit! And I feel it is my duty (not sure about my "right" anymore) as an American to speak up. Apparently, nearly two-thirds of the American electorate is with me on this one, according to the polls, but let us not quibble about details. Watch this space for a new cartoon. And keep your eyes on the prize -- a long, hard rebuilding effort. - RMcG

(PREVIOUS RANT from 9.28.06) THIS IS TORTURE. There is so much to say, yet so little. What can really be said which hasn't already been speechified? How did America come to this point, where torture becomes acceptable, where the tactics of banana republics become the law of the land? We got here because we stayed the course. We've witnessed the same stunts over and over (what was that definition of "insanity, again?), with the same horrible results, yet our "representatives" in Washington just cheer him on and even give him MORE power to continue on the same disastrous course. And worse. As if five years under the BushCo regime hasn't been torture enough, now it appears we're ready for the real thing. It's officially-government sactioned now. If we continue to stay THIS course, the landing is going to be most painful indeed, and like one of Bush's waterboarding victims, we'll scream anything they want to hear just to make it stop. That's what they're hoping for anyway. Break us down. Break us down.

This new cartoon isn't about torture, obviously. It was drawn nearly six weeks ago, but only recently did I color and complete it. So much has happened since then, but I didn't want to waste the cartoon. Click the link above to see the first version of this cartoon, and maybe suggest your own caption. For some reason, I don't have much "funny" in me these days.

Please donate to NBY! - RMcG


THE NBY NEWSROOM

09.29.96

Many Rights in U.S. Legal System Absent in New Bill

ANALYSIS by R. Jeffrey Smith, The Washington Post

The military trials bill approved by Congress lends legislative support for the first time to broad rules for the detention, interrogation, prosecution and trials of terrorism suspects far different from those in the familiar American criminal justice system.

President Bush's argument that the government requires extraordinary power to respond to the unusual threat of terrorism helped him win final support for a system of military trials with highly truncated defendant's rights. The United States used similar trials on just four occasions: during the country's revolution, the Mexican-American War, the Civil War and World War II.

Included in the bill, passed by Republican majorities in the Senate yesterday and the House on Wednesday, are unique rules that bar terrorism suspects from challenging their detention or treatment through traditional habeas corpus petitions. They allow prosecutors, under certain conditions, to use evidence collected through hearsay or coercion to seek criminal convictions.

The bill rejects the right to a speedy trial and limits the traditional right to self-representation by requiring that defendants accept military defense attorneys. Panels of military officers need not reach unanimous agreement to win convictions, except in death penalty cases, and appeals must go through a second military panel before reaching a federal civilian court.

By writing into law for the first time the definition of an "unlawful enemy combatant," the bill empowers the executive branch to detain indefinitely anyone it determines to have "purposefully and materially" supported anti-U.S. hostilities. Only foreign nationals among those detainees can be tried by the military commissions, as they are known, and sentenced to decades in jail or put to death.

At the same time, the bill immunizes U.S. officials from prosecution for cruel, inhumane or degrading treatment of detainees who the military and the CIA captured before the end of last year. It gives the president a dominant but not exclusive role in setting the rules for future interrogations of terrorism suspects.

Written largely, but not completely, on the administration's terms, with passages that give executive branch officials discretion to set details or divert from its protections, the bill is meant to provide what Bush said yesterday are "the tools" needed to handle terrorism suspects U.S. officials hope to capture.

For more than 57 months after the 2001 terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon, Bush maintained that he did not need congressional authorization of such tools. But the Supreme Court decided otherwise in June, declaring the administration's detainee treatment and trial procedures illegal, and ruling that Bush must first seek Congress's approval. (CONTINUED)


"In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." - Martin Luther King Jr.

09.28.96

Rushing Off A Cliff

OPINION from The New York Times

Here’s what happens when this irresponsible Congress railroads a profoundly important bill to serve the mindless politics of a midterm election: The Bush administration uses Republicans’ fear of losing their majority to push through ghastly ideas about antiterrorism that will make American troops less safe and do lasting damage to our 217-year-old nation of laws — while actually doing nothing to protect the nation from terrorists. Democrats betray their principles to avoid last-minute attack ads. Our democracy is the big loser.

Republicans say Congress must act right now to create procedures for charging and trying terrorists — because the men accused of plotting the 9/11 attacks are available for trial. That’s pure propaganda. Those men could have been tried and convicted long ago, but President Bush chose not to. He held them in illegal detention, had them questioned in ways that will make real trials very hard, and invented a transparently illegal system of kangaroo courts to convict them.

It was only after the Supreme Court issued the inevitable ruling striking down Mr. Bush’s shadow penal system that he adopted his tone of urgency. It serves a cynical goal: Republican strategists think they can win this fall, not by passing a good law but by forcing Democrats to vote against a bad one so they could be made to look soft on terrorism.

Last week, the White House and three Republican senators announced a terrible deal on this legislation that gave Mr. Bush most of what he wanted, including a blanket waiver for crimes Americans may have committed in the service of his antiterrorism policies. Then Vice President Dick Cheney and his willing lawmakers rewrote the rest of the measure so that it would give Mr. Bush the power to jail pretty much anyone he wants for as long as he wants without charging them, to unilaterally reinterpret the Geneva Conventions, to authorize what normal people consider torture, and to deny justice to hundreds of men captured in error.

These are some of the bill’s biggest flaws:

Enemy Combatants: A dangerously broad definition of “illegal enemy combatant” in the bill could subject legal residents of the United States, as well as foreign citizens living in their own countries, to summary arrest and indefinite detention with no hope of appeal. The president could give the power to apply this label to anyone he wanted.

The Geneva Conventions: The bill would repudiate a half-century of international precedent by allowing Mr. Bush to decide on his own what abusive interrogation methods he considered permissible. And his decision could stay secret — there’s no requirement that this list be published.

Habeas Corpus: Detainees in U.S. military prisons would lose the basic right to challenge their imprisonment. These cases do not clog the courts, nor coddle terrorists. They simply give wrongly imprisoned people a chance to prove their innocence.

Judicial Review: The courts would have no power to review any aspect of this new system, except verdicts by military tribunals. The bill would limit appeals and bar legal actions based on the Geneva Conventions, directly or indirectly. All Mr. Bush would have to do to lock anyone up forever is to declare him an illegal combatant and not have a trial. (CONTINUED)


09.27.06

GOP Can’t Handle the 9/11 Truth

By JOE CONASON, Truthdig.com

The most amusing part of the confrontation between former President Bill Clinton and “Fox News Sunday” anchor Chris Wallace came in the immediate aftermath, when the bullies of cable and their wingnut gang shrieked about the mean, crazy man picking on them.

Waah! Waah! Waah! they wailed. Clinton planned it! Clinton tricked Fox! Clinton melted down! Clinton is responsible for 9/11!

If Wallace didn’t want to provoke a tough answer, he shouldn’t have impersonated a tough interviewer. By insinuating that Clinton was somehow derelict in failing to eliminate Osama bin Laden, Al Qaeda and the Taliban, he reopened a can of worms that he should have left shut.

That incident wasn’t the first time that the Republican Party’s media servants, at Fox and elsewhere, have tried to falsify the history of American conflict with Al Qaeda for partisan purposes. The smearing began within months after 9/11.

As Clinton sarcastically pointed out, his conservative critics show little concern about the Bush administration’s failure to act against the jihadist enemy for eight months after taking office. Not only did they refuse to do anything, but they and their top aides refused to even talk about doing anything.

What the Wallace interview and its aftermath proved is that the Republicans can be relied upon to take the path of political convenience—and to blame someone else for it later. In full confidence that nobody will look up the facts, they love to claim that they were courageous, steadfast and farsighted, when they actually displayed the opposite qualities.

Consider Wallace’s claim that “when you pulled troops out of Somalia in 1993, [Osama] bin Laden said, ‘I have seen the frailty and the weakness and the cowardice of U.S. troops,’ ” which suggests that Clinton had “cut and run.” Actually, he resisted Republican demands for an immediate withdrawal of U.S. troops from Somalia—where President George Herbert Walker Bush had sent them—precisely because he wanted to preserve American credibility.

The Senate Republican leadership openly sought to weaken him by cutting off funding for the mission, which Clinton managed to sustain for another six months after the disastrous Black Hawk Down firefight in Mogadishu. (Among those who counseled retreat was Sen. John McCain.) But now the Republicans want to blame Clinton for doing what they forced him to do in 1993. (CONTINUED)


09.29.06

Amnesty slams terror suspect abuse

From THE AUSTRALIAN correspondents

RIGHTS group Amnesty International has condemned the abuse of terrorist suspects caught in Pakistan, saying hundreds had "disappeared", while others were tortured or sold on to US authorities.

In a report the London-based group said bounty hunters routinely help arrest suspects, who are then sold on abroad including to the United States' infamous prison camp at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.

"The road to Guantanamo very literally starts in Pakistan," said Amnesty's Claudio Cordone, commenting on the report.

"Hundreds of people have been picked up in mass arrests, many have been sold to the USA as 'terrorists' simply on the word of their captor, and hundreds have been transferred to Guantanamo Bay, Bagram Airbase (a US base in Afghanistan) or secret detention centres run by the USA," he said.

Pakistan has supported the US-led global war on terrorism since it was launched by US President George W. Bush shortly after the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks on New York and Washington.

As part of this Islamabad has deployed 80,000 troops along the border with Afghanistan to hunt down Taliban militants and al-Qaeda fugitives, thought to have sneaked into the rugged region after the Taliban fell in late 2001.

But Amnesty alleges that, in cooperating in the 'war on terror', "the Pakistani government has systematically committed human rights abuses against hundreds of Pakistanis and foreign nationals".

"Hundreds of terror suspects have disappeared after being taken into custody, many by Pakistan's intelligence services," said the report.

"A large number of war on terror detainees have been literally sold into US hands by bounty hunters who have received cash payments in return, typically $US5000 ($6700)," it said.. (CONTINUED)


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